Funniest Rated Tweets

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  GaryJBusey: I'm glad parts of the Arizona Immigration Law were blocked because my hedges were starting to look like shit.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-29 14:27:38Z, 72% funny (130 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: Sorry you think I'm unfunny, but it's like your Mom always said "I want to please every dick in the world, I just can't."
  First Nominated: 2010-05-27 15:29:22Z, 86% funny (61 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: How does E! expect me to keep up with the Kardashians when a scale can't.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-22 15:36:07Z, 72% funny (83 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: The #nexttimewehavesex, don't freak out when I call you Justin Bieber during.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-27 14:48:54Z, 71% funny (84 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: I like going to IKEA with my girlfriend and having a fake domestic dispute in the display kitchens just to see if it's homely.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-25 17:08:18Z, 73% funny (78 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: I like my parties like the autopsy scene in Silence Of The Lambs; everyone with white powder under their noses and a dead body on the table
  First Nominated: 2010-07-06 16:03:34Z, 94% funny (36 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: Blowing your entire off aint that bad once they put that awesome-looking hook where your hand was.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-05 16:42:18Z, 94% funny (35 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: On the set of Lethal Weapon, I caught Mel Gibson cutting eye holes into some white sheets. He said it was to scare Glover. #filmconfessions
  First Nominated: 2010-07-30 14:34:42Z, 60% funny (147 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: If owls are so fucking smart, how come they don't say "whom"?
  First Nominated: 2010-05-28 14:48:11Z, 89% funny (38 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: From one actor to another, I'd like to apologize to you @KhloeKardashian. Wait, you were in Harry and the Hendersons, right?
  First Nominated: 2010-05-30 16:52:48Z, 80% funny (47 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: Technically, ears can be "Love Handles" too.
  First Nominated: 2010-06-26 18:57:59Z, 75% funny (54 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: For a day, America was on Lebron's dick, just to find out he was going to play in Florida, America's dick.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-09 15:32:47Z, 85% funny (40 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: There's ugly. Then there's "day-shift stripper" ugly.
  First Nominated: 2010-06-28 15:51:15Z, 78% funny (50 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: I see that "Brownout" is trending. That can only mean one thing: @El_Danny_Trejo is on the loose.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-14 15:53:30Z, 71% funny (64 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice and I'll shit inside of your mailbox.
  First Nominated: 2010-06-09 17:44:46Z, 82% funny (41 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: Twitter reminds me of your Mom: I open a window, put my log in, leave a little something in a box, log out, then close the window.
  First Nominated: 2010-06-18 15:22:00Z, 84% funny (39 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: And now, a Haiku about Twitter: "It's a sad cycle. Celebs tweet their stupid thoughts...and you retweet it."
  First Nominated: 2010-05-28 14:52:46Z, 77% funny (49 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: Facebook is about to hit it's 500 millionth user this week, but still has a ways to go to beat out your Mom.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-20 15:33:41Z, 82% funny (41 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: I haven't showered in a week in anticipation for a job interview with the Wu Tang Clan for the "Ol' Dirty Bastard" position.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-07 16:24:43Z, 88% funny (35 votes) show
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  GaryJBusey: The best way to get a Lady Gaga song out of your head is with a bullet.
  First Nominated: 2010-07-22 15:34:39Z, 76% funny (50 votes) show